I already felt much better after the test treatment at the end of May. The definitive treatment started the third week of June. I have obtained good results after the first month of therapy, a few things have already changed in my life.
. I feel more lucid, I’m less confused, I can think more quickly and I can remember things and names more quickly. I’m less chaotic. I feel like doing things, I deal with things more quickly and things are going better.
. I seldom feel lonely or unhappy. I again have contact with a number of friends with whom the contact had decreased. We talked things over as a result of which we are close again. I do more things with friends and I enjoy life more. I feel more cheerful, I feel fulfilled and the empty feeling is no longer there. I’m more self-confident, I have more zest for life. It’s like there is a more positive flow in my life, I’m no longer stuck. I do enjoyable things once again, something I hadn’t done or hadn’t been able to do for a very long time.
. I react well to the LTA therapy, I’m in the fast group and I’m very glad about that, I’m very glad Linda can help me. I had hoped I would be considered for the free treatment ever since I read her website. I’m very grateful that I’m finally progressing and that there is finally some real help in my life. I was stressed about making my story public at first. But now I only feel strong and I think I’m I’m fortunate to have been given this chance. The previous therapies I received didn’t actually help me. Every time I was disappointed by all the promises that had been made and the things that had been said that weren’t true. Now I have been feeling (since the test treatment) good for the first time in a very long time. I’m happier, I can laugh, I can enjoy the beautiful things, I’m less inhibited.
. I have given up my job and I’m unemployed for the moment. I have chosen not to do a job that doesn’t fit my personality.
I finally know what I want to do regarding study: I have been accepted for the teacher training in the academy of art. This is a part-time training, two days a week. I had to make a work for an entrance exam on July 1st. Whereas otherwise I suffer from a lack of inspiration and creativity, I was very creative and I had an awful lot of inspiration and I worked at it in a very nice way without the insecurity, anxiety and doubt I always used to experience. I even found a new way of working. If felt like I had wings. I made a great deal of things and it all went very fluently and easily and I enjoyed it very much, a very special feeling. Every day I got the most out of my time without stress, but with joy and enthusiasm. I had ideas, I could hold onto them and execute them at the same time. I was able to think practically: ‘what is achievable, what is feasible, what do I need?’ I was practical with the time: I was ready amply in time and I made an awful lot. I was able to work calmly and with appropriate energy instead of wasting energy due to stress and thinking. I worked sensibly by day and until about twelve o’clock at night. In the past it went like this: I doubted very much about an idea, I didn’t dare to make choices, I dreaded it, I was very fearful and very stressed, I had to think very much and I made lists, I didn’t make and didn’t do very much, I couldn’t estimate what was achievable and what wasn’t, I worked sloppily, my work wasn’t finished off, I worked at night and I sometimes used drugs. This time I didn’t work all night long, I was ready nicely in time two days in advance. I knew what I was going to make from day one and I simply did this with focus and joy, without stress or doubt.
. The presentation of my work before the evaluation commission went exceedingly well. I felt self-confident, I was at ease, not nervous at all and I was able to explain my work well. The commission was impressed by my work and also about the way I had presented it. I was and am very glad about that and I feel stronger and happier and I again have faith in myself. And I’m very relieved that the doubts about myself and about which study to take on are finally gone.
. I feel more like meeting people. I have more contact with people and I’m more open towards people. I care less about what people think of me or say about me and that feels like a relief. I rarely feel nervous, tense, inhibited or shy anymore when meeting people and I make contact easily. I also no longer want to get away as quickly as possible. Now I’m at ease in a large group of people, I make contact easily and I can express myself fluently. I can be myself. I’m no longer ashamed of myself. I used to be ashamed about all kinds of things in which I didn’t come up to the mark. I’m rarely ashamed anymore and that feels like a relief. I also feel less suspicious towards people as a result of which I clam up less in the company of people.
. I can more easily express my feelings because I’m less insecure and less inhibited. I’m rarely hurt anymore. I no longer avoid people I don’t consider friends, I no longer feel the need to avoid them.
. I’m looking forward to the future now. I no longer feel I have failed in life. I have accepted myself and I no longer dwell upon past failures. I worry less. I enjoy life more and I do enjoyable things. I rarely feel negative or too serious anymore and I have much more confidence.
. I have finished my to-do list. I must admit I might have done it somewhat faster, but I have finally posted a notice of objection I had been working on for a year and I have applied for funds and I have handed in my tax declaration. I have cleaned out and tidied up the attic, I have cleaned out and cleared my accounts, I have sorted out my life a lot. I practice sports again.
. I’m less nervous, I’m less stressed in general, I’m less easily frustrated, I’m no longer restless inside, I feel more peaceful in general.
. I’m much less tired.
. I sleep more peacefully, but still a lot.
. I no longer regret how I used to be or what I have done, now I look at it like this: I was only myself and I have learnt from all the things I have done and have experienced. I no longer feel old grief, neither with regard to people I have been at loggerheads with. I have been able to give up feelings of resentment towards a former friend, we have talked things through. I no longer feel bitterness or resentment towards school or old acquaintances or friends. I have finally been able to let go of some things (school and the negative experience with teachers and myself), my ex, I have been able to talk other things through and they are back in my life. It feels like a new beginning now. All kinds of less enjoyable events from the past no longer hurt, I no longer dwell upon them.
. I’m very much relieved about having enjoyed myself again for the first time since a long time … in a very different way than before. Simply really relaxed…what a relief! And simply really enjoying myself… doing enjoyable things, meeting people in a spontaneous way, spontaneous, like it should be.
. I no longer worry about not being good enough or smart enough. I simply need to do work that suits me. I actually am wise and smart and I have been through enough so as to see things in the right perspective. I no longer think about myself , I have accepted myself and I live in the present. I feel I again have a purpose in life and that gives me an incredible amount of energy. Having inspiration to make things gives me an enormous joy. Being able to share the company of kindred spirits in a relaxed and spontaneous way gives me so much positivity. I feel so much better and hence all the things I worried about are no longer a cause for concern at the moment.
. I feel less easily guilty about things I should have done and didn’t do like for example meditating, exercising, eating healthily.
. I have accepted myself. Hence all feelings of inferiority and of shame I used to have about the way I am and about not yet having achieved anything are gone. I no longer doubt myself. I no longer have to prove myself.
. My complex about not being good at anything is gone. Now I think I’m not perfect, but good enough, I know I’m good at certain things and less good at others. I’m well-balanced.
. I have accepted the fact that I’m not easily attracted to a man and that I don’t have sex much. I no longer dwell much upon my sex life, we’ll see what the future will bring.
. I’m no longer occupied with death, I’m no longer afraid of losing one of my parents or my brother or of not being able to cope when one of my parents would be dead. I still sometimes worry that someone from my family would get ill, but not as much as before.
. For the moment I have no fears and I have confidence in myself and in the future. Thoughts about the recurring depressions, school, debts or a home no longer hinder my inner calm or my confidence.
. People annoy me less, I haven’t had any negative feelings towards people close to me, maybe because I have adopted a different attitude? Or because I distrust people less?
. Changing moods or irritability have been troubling me less for the last two months. I do still need to sleep and eat well, if not I’m still irritable.
. When I have to clean the house, I do it better than before, it’s no longer poor work.
. I still have a tendency to postpone things, but a whole lot less, though.
. I can better cope when I have to do a lot of things the same day. I had to do quite a lot of things in one day at the last presentation, but I was better able to cope with everything. And when I didn’t manage, I accepted this as well. I have been much better at organizing and planning, without rushing myself and without stress.
. I always used to be late and now I’m almost always on time.
. I can make decisions about all kinds of things much more easily, as if I’m more in touch with my own feelings and I feel what’s right. I can make decisions independently and I no longer need advice. I have rarely contact with mediums anymore in order to ask questions about issues in my life and when I do, I often don’t believe them anymore, because I trust my own intuition more. I’m not that impressionable anymore.
. I can better stand up for myself, I can better refuse, I have much more confidence and I no longer give in so easily.
. I can better express myself, I can usually find the right words.
. I now have sufficient people in my life that I can talk to and that I love. I feel I have sufficient friends I’m on the same wavelength with now and that I have fun with and that I can also discuss serious issues with.
. I rarely worry about my looks anymore. I have accepted my appearance and I’m more satisfied with how I look. I have also accepted that I’m not perfect.
. I no longer compare myself to other people or to artists and therefore I no longer feel threatened by anybody.
